Matsuda Wishes
by MLMsky4life
Summary: Matsuda wishes he's in love again, it's been so long since he fell in love with Mimi. And he get what he wants. But is falling in love with the two geniuses who get closer and closer to each other such a good idea...? Past Matsuda/OC, L/Light.
1. Matsuda Wonders

_A/N: So here we are again:)__ This time, Matsu is our hero^^ He…actually gets mocked in Visiting the Yagami's, but I like him so much:3 Sorry, Matsu, you are great!! Could you call this a Matsu-tribute?:) I thought the summary didn't exactly fit anymore while I was writing the third chap, so I changed it...It sounded too soapy, I think^^ Don't be angry...^^ Enjoy_

_**1. Matsuda Wonders**_

Matsuda isn't uncertain about the fact that he's a first-class optimist. He's always happy, bright, looks on the light side and cheers everybody up.

Neither is he about the fact that he's a fine young man, or that he's smart. He joins the police force, after all.

But there's something else he is uncertain of.

Will he ever find a love?

-----------------------------

Matsuda suddenly gets pulled out of his thoughts by someone knocking on his door. He lives together with the Suzuki-family, who had a room for rent, and Matsuda didn't hesitate for a second and reacted. Now, he's a young policeman who works most of the time, but all the family members like him. He feels welcome.

'Hello, Matsu!!'

Oh, it's Emi. He opens the door to let the girl next door of the Suzuki's in his acceptably big room with big windows at two sides, at the south-west, so the sun fully shines into his room. He has a great view from his room. The house stands at the point where a hill begins to slope down, and for about a mile away is a nice park he can perfectly look at. Yes, Matsuda lives very nice. He lets Emi in.

'Hello, Emi! How are you doing? And how is your almost-boyfriend doing?!'

'Oh, I don't see him very often. He's busy, I guess…He's very smart. He's always studying.'

'Really? What if you call him?'

'No. He always reacts so cold when I call him. But then he calls me and then he's warm and gentle, and sounds like he likes me.'

Matsuda blinks. Why would anyone be cold to his little girl next door? She's definitely cute. 17, or so.

Not for Matsuda, in any case. But he likes her as a friend, not as a love.

Matsuda hates the fact that his love life's so boring at the moment. Nice people everywhere, but he never falls in love with them!! And you can't force yourself to fall in love, he knows.

What if there would be someone showing up who totally blows his mind, making him sing and dance all day long, jumping around and whistling…Not that he doesn't already, but Matsuda likes to be in love.

Yes, he remembers the first time he fell in love…

-----------------------------

The sun shines. The wind blows through the trees standing in the yard of Nagasaki Middle School. Touta Matsuda, 15 year old, is running around in the yard, trying to catch flees together with some girl friends of him. He has a lot of them. They like him, and he feels them getting happier when they're around him.

And of course, that makes him so happy.

'Touta-chaaan!!'

'Whaaat?!'

'Look!! Do you know Mimi?!'

'Mimi?!'

'Yes!! Over here!!'

Mimi turns out to be a shy-looking girl with round glasses, beautiful brown eyes and black hair, and freckles. She greets Matsuda with a shy 'H-hi..' and blushes. Matsuda blushes too. The other girls standing around them giggle. 'Let's leave them alone!! We still have to catch flees for our biology project!!'

'Yay!!'

Both Mimi and Matsuda don't look up and blush.

'So, heh, you are Mimi…'

'Y-yes…'

'S-so I am Matsuda. Nice to meet you, Mimi-san.'

'Y-yes, me too…'

It's quiet for a while. Matsuda wonders what to say now.

He decides to sit down next to her.

'Nice weather, isn't it…?'

'Y-yes, I really like the sun…It makes me feel warm.'

Matsuda feels warm too. On the inside.

'Are you new here?'

'No, I am from Rumiko-san's old class, my school is for about three miles away from here. We used to play here a lot. Nice building.'

'W-would you like to play here again? With us?'

She looks up. First, Mimi hesitates. Then her face brightens.

-----------------------------

Emi cheers.

'Awww, how did it end? Do you still know her?'

'No. She transferred to England and after a while, we mailed less, stopped calling each other and…Well, I haven't heard of her since I called her for Christmas two years ago. We kinda got separated...'

'Call her!!'

'Oh, do you think she'd like it?!'

'Of course she will!!'

Matsuda smiles.

'Well then, let's do it!!'

-----------------------------

15-year-old Matsuda sits home, behind his desk. He actually has to finish his homework, but he isn't concentrated enough.

He's thinking about Mimi.

He had a lot of fun today. The more they played, the more Mimi opened up and laughed, and the other girls liked her too. Everybody was happy and cheerful.

Suddenly, the mobile lying next to his book rings.

'Touta-chaaaan!!'

'Rumi-chan?! Hello!!'

'Do you want to know who really likes you…?'

'Who?'

'Mimi!! She could only talk about you!! You really made a big impression!!'

Matsuda cheers inside. Wohooo!! Mimi, he made a big impression!! On her!!

'Wow, really?! Well, I like her too!! Will she come again, tomorrow?!'

'Yes, but…The other girls and I can't. So it will be the two of you together!!'

'Huh?'

'Yes!! Touta, she's coming to our school again, just to see you!!'

'Did she say so?!'

'She said I better kept it for myself, but now I know that you like her too…'

'Wow, thank you, Rumi, thank you very much!!!'

'You're oh-so welcome, Touta-chan!!'

-----------------------------

Matsuda sits in his room again, disappointed.

He called Mimi.

Mimi has a boyfriend.

She doesn't want to talk to him, afraid she'll fall in love with him again.

He feels sad.

Yes, the always happy Matsuda feels sad.

Mimi.

Now just his old youth memory.

-----------------------------

'Matsuda!! You're late again!!'

'Oh, yes, sorry!! I couldn't sleep last night!!'

'Oh well. Get to work!!'

'O-oh, right, what do I have to do…?'

No, Matsuda couldn't sleep last night. He was thinking about his Mimi. She always felt so close, even now they were separated. But now she has a boyfriend.

Another guy who loves her.

And she loves him too.

Matsuda sighs. He's working on the Kira-case, but it doesn't interest him. All he wants is Mimi back.

With her glasses.

And her freckles.

And her cuteness.

She used to make him so happy. But not anymore.

'What?! The FBI?!'

'Twelve FBI agents were killed, when they were investigating…The police!!'

'The FBI was spying on us?!'

'In order of L?!'

'What the heck?!'

'I knew you can't trust that guy!!'

Matsuda blinks.

Is he so slow, so fast or is it only logical to investigate the police when there's a leak of information somewhere?

Matsuda has respect for L. He doesn't know what he must look like, what kind of person he is or if he actually is the middle-aged detective-guy everybody thinks he is. But Matsuda thinks he must be a strong and very intelligent man. One with a moustache. He'd like to meet him.

'I think it's logical…'

'Matsuda, at whose side are you?! Twelve FBI-agents died when they were investigating US!! L's orders!! HIS FAULT!!'

Aizawa is a jerk…

'I'm gonna stop!!'

'Me too!!'

'I don't want to die!!'

What... The police is going to stop their search for Kira...?

-----------------------------

'H-hello, Mimi…'

'Hello, Touta-san…'

'S-so, everybody else is gone…'

'Yes, Rumiko-san already said so…'

'Shall we go to the shop? I have to get my Mum some potatoes and all…'

'Oh, sure…'

Potatoes for his mother, how could he say something so dumb...?

But Mimi doesn't blink, tell him he's soft or weird. In fact, she smiles at his cuteness and nods.

They stand up. Matsuda and Mimi walk to the shop, in the sun, together. Matsuda feels bright. It feels nice to be with Mimi.

'You help your Mum? That's so nice of you.'

'Oh, yes, I like helping, very much!'

'I like helping people…' Mimi blushes. Matsuda too.

'Hey, the shop…'

Matsuda didn't realize they're already there.

The middle-aged, grey clerk smiles at them when they walk in.

'Two pounds of potatoes, please.'

'Here you go…'

Well, then. That's 300 yen.'

Matsuda searches his pockets. Shit…

'Uhh, I only have 200…'

'That's not enough, isn't it?'

'Wait, uhh…'

Oh shit, he forgot to bring enough money!! Not now, he's with Mimi…Oh, right, he forgot the money because he was _going _to see her, but this isn't fair…

'Here.'

In a few seconds, Mimi puts her hand in the pocket of her bag and puts 300 yen next to the other 200.

'M-mimi..?'

'That's 200 yen too much, young lady.'

'Yes…Please get us half an ounce of those caramel chocolates.'

Matsuda blinks.

'Here you go...'

A few seconds later, Matsuda walks next to Mimi, with in one hand his potatoes, and in the other hand…

Her hand.

His heart beats, he wants to sing. So happyyy…!!

They share the caramel chocolates together. They taste so delicious. Matsuda promises Mimi he will pay for her the next time. Not really because of the fact that she paid for him. But because he likes her.

He really, really likes her.

-----------------------------

'Everybody, please stay calm and listen.'

Oh, it's the Chief.

'Please listen. Everybody who's hunting Kira risks his life. We can't force you to do this. I want to ask you…Everybody who wants to keep on searching for Kira, please meet me at five o'clock here. Thank you.'

Everybody continues what they were doing. Matsuda walks outside, and sits down on a chair. Yes. He wants to continue this, together with Chief Yagami.

Hey, there he comes!

'Hello, Chief!!'

'Oh, hello, Matsuda…'

'I want to continue!!'

Soichiro blinks.

'I want to catch Kira and work together with you, Chief!!'

Matsuda's chief smiles.

'Good to hear that, Matsuda. Then, I see you at five o'clock…'

'Dad!!'

'Light, what are you doing here…?'

'I'm bringing you clean clothes. Mum sent me.'

'Oh, that's very nice of her…'

Matsuda blinks. He has seen this boy before, Yagami Light…Chief Yagami's brilliant son.

And wow, he's brilliant. He's the smartest in his class, no, at his school…Oh, wait!! He just turned out to be the smartest kid of his year!! And he was tennis junior champion, twice. And, he's so nice. He has a kind smile, a perfect, tanned and smooth skin, and very beautiful brown-caramel-eyes that almost seem to glow. Matsuda catches himself staring at his Chief's son. They chat a bit and only pay attention for each other. Matsuda feels invisible.

'Goodbye, Dad, I'm proud of you.'

'If there's someone who has to be proud, it's me, son.'

Matsuda watches when the two males hug and pat each other on the back. Strange. He wants to hug.

'Thank your Mum for the clothes, and greet Sayu from me.'

'I will!!'

Matsuda still feels slightly transparent when the chief watches his son walking out of the door.

'Wow, Light is really growing into a mature boy, isn't it?'

'That's called a man, Matsuda.'

Matsuda gets the hint. Right, he's not a real man, he knows…Suddenly, he thinks about Mimi again and the whole weight of his chief's giant butt falls into his stomach. Or at least it feels like that. Sad. He wishes he were Light. He's probably thinking about tennis and math or a girl. Or something every teenage boy thinks about all day long…

'Chief, I'd like to go get a sandwich.'

'That's fine, Matsuda. Be back at five o'clock, okay?'

_A/N: Well, as you can see...I like you, Matsu^^ You're cute:) Next chap you're going to meet L...Yeah, you wonder, isn't it?:)_

_And you: Review:)_


	2. Matsuda Smiles

_A/N: Hello!! Here we are again^^ Thanks to __**kowie **__and __**The**__**Wammy Girl**__ for reviewing:D LOL thanks^^ L will 'finally' show his face here:3 I love that guy^^ And Matsu:3 Sweet..._

_**2. Matsuda Smiles**_

So. Matsuda's going to work with L.

He already did, but now closer…

Working with L and Watari, on an almost personal level. Wow, so exciting…

Matsuda represses the urge to 'Yay!!'

They're standing in the same room where the Chief had told them to come back if they wanted to work together with L. Watari is there too, with the laptop with the L on it.

And L just said that he trusts them all.

Ide pokes Aizawa with his elbow.

'Wait a minute…L trusts us…But we don't trust him at all!!'

'L, you know very well that the chance is very big that this will cost us our lives.'

'Yes, show us your face if you really want to work together with us!!'

'We will work together to catch Kira, but without you!!'

Stupid Aizawa, he's so mean…

'I just said that I trust you. Watari…'

Watari turns around the laptop and a message of L's appears.

_What's going to happen now, is a secret between the eight of us._

? A secret?! Exciting!!

_I consider to meet the six of you I fully trust, but the fact that we see each other, what we do…Don't say a word about it to the people who aren't here right now, whether they are police agents, family or friends._

O-oh!! He's going to meet L?!

_Now leave the building and think well if you want to trust me or not and can agree with this. Everyone who wants to work together with us, come back here again. I will give you information about the terms to meet each other._

Yay!! Of course!!

-----------------------------

Matsuda cheers. Today, Mimi will be coming again!! He just saw her yesterday, but he can't wait to see that smile again…Ahh, he's so in love…

'Hello!!'

'Hello, Mimi!!'

'Ho-'

'Mimi, we have to talk with you.'

Before Matsuda knows it, Mimi gets pulled away by a few girl friends of his. They glance his way, giggle and Mimi blushes and nods sometimes. Matsuda just stands there and watches. What could they be talking about…?

The girls come back, holding Mimi's hands.

'Mimi and Touta, we are going to…'

'What?!'

'Connect you in the oath!!'

'...?!'

Mimi and Matsuda both blush and widen their eyes by hearing that. Rumiko walks forward, her hands held ceremonious against each other, her blonde hair falling along her face, making her look like some kind of angel. A love angel, maybe…?

'Mimi, will you take Touta's hand in a relationship that will survive icy cold and burning hot, test weeks and separated holidays, distance, pain, hate and love?'

Mimi blushes when Rumiko puts Mimi's hand in Matsuda's.

'Y-yes, I will…

'And Touta, will you take Mimi's hand in a relationship that survives icy cold and burning hot, test weeks and separated holidays, distance, pain, hate and love?'

'Yes, I will.'

Matsuda smiles and blushes.

Then, you may now kiss the groom, Mimi.

Mimi only blushes and looks at Matsuda to see his reaction.

Matsuda blushes ever so heavily when he bows and closes the distance between him and Mimi, and his lips finally touch hers, and when he hears the other girls giggle and cheer.

-----------------------------

One Ide less and a few hours later, Matsuda walks together with his chief into the Imperial Hotel. It's quiet, and the tension is almost visible in the elevator that lifts them up higher and higher…

Matsuda looks up when the soft 'ping' tells them they reached the right floor. L's floor, in fact…

Aizawa, Mogi and Ukita are already sitting there. Poor guys, they must've been waiting more than half an hour for the Chief and Matsuda…Like L in the room behind the white door at the end of the corridor.

They walk at it.

Soichiro knocks on it.

'I already expected you. Come in.'

The door opens a bit.

The door opens furtherer.

They can look into the room.

And in the middle of the expensive-looking and big room, stands…

A young man.

With messy black hair.

And black bags under his eyes.

He pulls a slightly silly face when he talks.

'I am L.'

L.

Matsuda blinks. So, this is L? A young man. Twenty-three? Twenty? Younger? He has a boyish face with a white and equal skin. He hunches over a bit, and he's skinny, Matsuda sees. Strange guy. But not ugly.

Everybody names himself. Suddenly, the silly look on L's face gets replaced by a dark one.

He lifts up his arm…

'Bang.'

'?!'

'What?!'

'Are you laughing with us?!'

'If I were Kira, you'd be dead right now, mister Soichiro Yagami.'

-----------------------------

So. L really is L.

He's strange. He wanted everyone to turn off their phones. For a second, Matsuda thinks about Mimi…Then he returns to L. He sits strange. Childish, with his knees pulled up. He drinks five or more sugars in his tea. He's so different from how Matsuda imagined him, definitely not the actually Soichiro Yagami-like detective with the moustache. This man is more like Light. Young, smooth skin, slightly long hair, fine features, slender frame.

But, at some point he definitely is like the L in Matsuda's mind. He's smart. Brilliant. From all the milliards of people in the world, L-oh, wait- Ryuzaki, reduced it to only 141 people and their acquaintances. Like this, they'll find Kira in no time!!

'L, I have a question. You said that you hate to lose. Doesn't the fact that you had to show your face mean you lost?'

'You're right. The fact that I had to show my face, and the deaths of the FBI-agents, mean I lost this fight.

But…'

L's hands twitch slightly.

'..I will win the war!! I will go to the end. I want to show the ones who collected here…that Justice Will Prevail!'

Matsuda gapes together with the others at the dazzling, childish and oh-so cute smile that just appeared on that face, above those hands resting on those knees. It makes his heart beat faster. He never expected someone like this, the great L, to pull a face like this…

'Y-you're right!!'

'We will find Kira!!'

'Let's go for it!!'

'Let's catch Kira, L- uhh...Ryuzaki!!'

L stands up and begins to walk around.

'Then, I will, to make sure that Kira isn't among us, question you all one by one.'

-----------------------------

After an hour playing poker with Aizawa and Mogi, it's finally Matsuda's turn to come in.

'H-hello…'

L is sitting in his strange way behind a table. He waves at the chair in front of it, and Matsuda sits down. L looks at him directly, what somehow makes him blush. His eyes are wide and dark. He looks like he knows everything that goes on in Matsuda's mind. Scaring.

Fascinating.

Strange.

L's voice is low, a bit monotone and very calm when he speaks, in a strange contrast with his focused and intense gaze.

'Touta Matsuda.'

'Yes.'

'Birth date: 12-14-78. Age: 26.'

'Yes…'

'You live together with the Suzuki-family in Nagasaki, you have your own room with your own kitchen, your own computer and your own telephone, and mobile.'

'Y-yes…'

'You're 5'7", and your current weight is 130 lbs.'

'Y-yes…'

Matsuda feels himself getting nervous. How does he know this all…?! His weight?! Matsuda hasn't weighed himself in…half a year!! And how did he manage to say everything so fast and correctly…? When Ukita walked out here, L didn't look at a file or something…There's no paper at all in this room…

Suddenly, Matsuda thinks about this skinny boy asking Aizawa for his weight, or Mogi…That must've been funny. Or the chief…? Matsuda wonders how heavy L is. And how tall. Boy-like.

L's eyes somehow turn a bit less intense.

'Allright, Matsuda-san, let's get to the point. What do you know about Kira?'

'Uhh…He's a serial killer who wants to kill all the criminals with a heart attack, but also kills FBI-agents…?'

'Good. More?'

'He…can kill people by only knowing their names and face…'

'And?'

'H-he probably lives in the Kanto-region, and he can manipulate the times of death, and the circumstances…'

'Yes?'

'It could be that he's a student, and has connections with the police…'

'Right?'

'…That was it, I guess…'

Matsuda feels himself beginning to sweat. Does L really suspect him of being Kira…? That look makes him nervous…

'What kind of person do you think Kira must be?'

'…Wha…?'

L doesn't show any irritation, or any emotion at all, when he repeats his question.

'What kind of person do you think Kira must be?'

'Well…He kills criminals, so some kind of someone who wants to do the right…'

L doesn't say anything.

'And…Maybe it's true that he really is a school kid, it was a mistake he turned into something to challenge us, I mean…You…'

L's expression softens a bit, again. He really looks pretty, Matsuda notices. Calm. Restrained. But still...childish. Innocent.

'So, you actually believe I am L?'

Matsuda blushes. Does he mean that or does he just want to confirm what he already knows…? But, he doesn't think about that for too long.

'Of course. You are cool. I mean…You definitely are different from how I imagined you, with a moustache and all, but you are smart, and talk like the L from the laptop…'

'What if that would be someone else, and L is more than one person?'

'No, you are L!! I'm sure you are the real and only L. I feel it!!'

L's expression turns into a little smile that resembles his Justice Will Prevail-smile a bit. Matsuda looks at him, blushes again and suddenly realizes he's standing, his chair lying behind him helplessly. He holds a fist in the air, his other hand is lying flat on the black and reflecting table and he smiles dumbly, slightly bending over to the boy sitting in front of him.

'You can sit down again, Matsuda-san.'

'Uhh, sorry, I, uhh…'

'There's no need to apologize. We all do weird things, isn't it?'

Matsuda smiles again, smiling back to L. He somehow feels his heart pound.

'Do you think you know or thought of something that could help us?'

-----------------------------

Mimi and Matsuda are sitting in Matsuda's room. Matsuda's head dazzles. It all went so fast. In only a week, he met Mimi, talked to Mimi, had a date with Mimi, had another date with Mimi, kind-of-married Mimi, and even _kissed_ Mimi. And now, she's lying next to him on his bed, on her stomach.

'Touta-chan, do you understand this?'

'Mathematics? No…Oh, you have a different method than I have.'

'This, maybe?'

'The police?! Oh, I want to work there!!'

'Really? It's a project for sociology. Can you help me?'

'Of course!!'

Matsuda bends over to look over Mimi's shoulder. He lies on her shoulders with one arm, and leans on his elbow with the other one.

'What do you want to know?'

Mimi opens her mouth to say something, but gets cut off by the sight of Matsuda so close to her. Matsuda sees her head getting red again, a cute contrast with her freckles. Her eyes are enlarged by her glasses. She's so beautiful…

Matsuda hesitating moves his face to Mimi's again, slightly shaking. Mimi moves too…

'Touta-chaaan!! Mimi-saaan!! Tea for you!!'

Matsuda's mother stands in the doorway, with tea and cookies. She looks extremely happy and almost looks like she wants hug Matsuda. Then, she walks away, almost hopping.

' Well…Let's drink the tea, shall we?' Matsuda says. Mimi only looks back shyly, and slightly disappointed. Matsuda gets it, and leans forward again.

This time, nothing goes wrong. No one comes in, no shaking, no friends giggling. Matsuda lifts up his arm to hug Mimi, but he forgot the plate with tea and cookies standing on his bed. It shifts weight because of the pressure of Matsuda's arms, and the teacups fall and spread the hot strawberry-flavoured water over his bed.

'Aaah!!'

'Mimi?! Oh!! Are you okay…?'

'You let the tea drop all over your bed!!'

'Oh, god, that's pretty bad...How do I fix that?! Oh, wait, I'll get some clean sheets-'

Mimi shyly smiles to Matsuda.

Then, both burst out laughing.

-------------------------

_A/N: Yeah, that's the kind of love Matsuda deserves.^^_


	3. Matsuda Dreams

_A/N: Hi^^ Felt like it was time to update…Here ya go:D I also felt like the rating had to go up for a reason^^ I apologize for the sudden cruelties appearing here…Haha, I thought of this title, and later I saw how good it fitted this chap^^ Btw, I replaced the lines for ***-things...If you get annoyed, just say^^ Enjoy…_

_**3. Matsuda dreams**_

Matsuda feels strange. A strange sort of strange happiness, and the strange feeling of lack of sleep dazzles through his head. Strange. He met L. The L. And L is a young man. A very nice and pretty guy. A very nice and pretty and intelligent and sweet and mysterious and cute guy. It dazzles. Matsuda sighs in happiness. He met L. The L.

He barely notices when he opens the door of the Suzuki House and walks in to his own apartment.

'Matsuuuu!!!'

When he walks in, Emi is sitting on his couch, with tea. Huh, strange…It's five o'clock…

'Hello, Emi…What are you here for?'

Matsuda smiles at her.

'I want to hear more love stories!! They're so much fun, and kind of a distraction of my own love life…I just heard my guy goes out with other girls. And I don't dare to ask him. I'm scared of his reaction. Maybe he'll admit, or maybe he'll lie to me…'

'Shall we call him together, Emi? I will sit here and listen with you.'

'Really…? Do you want to do that…?'

'You did the same for me!!'

Emi smiles and takes her cell phone. She searches for the number of her mysterious boyfriend, and presses on the 'Call'-button. First, it's quiet, but after a while it begins to beep. And a bit later again begins the vague sound of the answering machine.

Emi presses the red button. 'I don't want to ask him this over the answering machine…'

'That's okay, shall we try it later?'

'I think I'll ask him tomorrow…We have a date, then…'

'Oh, good luck, then. Will you go to the cinema?'

'Matsu, now I want to hear another love story. I don't want to think about my guy now.'

'Allright…'

**

Mimi and Matsuda walk to the cinema together, holding hands. Matsuda shakes lightly, they're going to watch a thriller. And Matsuda is scared. No, not for the movie, but what is he supposed to do?! Does he have to comfort Mimi, or just watch the movie and show how tough he is…? Should he pay for the popcorn or would they share…? He decides it's not smart to think like this and tries not to worry too much.

That's not nice for Mimi.

'Scared, Touta-chan?'

'Slightly. Do I have to comfort you if you get scared or do you want me to show how tough I am?'

Mimi stares at him for a few seconds before she bursts out giggling and buries her face in Matsuda's shoulder. Matsuda blushes, and pats her on her back. Mimi is laughing. He did something good. He begins to feel comfortable again. Mimi pulls her head back and smiles at him again.

'Touta-chan, do you want to hold me during the movie…? I…only chose that movie so I could hug you…'

Matsuda blushes. Mimi blushes. She wraps her arms around Matsuda's waist and lies her head on his shoulder again, slightly hesitating. Matsuda wraps his arms around her too and enjoys the scent of cherry blossom and something that resembles hazelnuts. Mimi smells so nice. He inhales it and breaths out. Mimi notices.

'Do I smell strange…?'

'Y-yes, very nice…'

'Y-you actually smell nice too…'

Matsuda represses the urge to jump up and 'YAY!!' again. He showered, showered again, let Rumiko come over to smell if he smelled strange (which became kind of embarrassing as soon as she stood in his bathroom), poured aftershave all over him, and washed it away again with a scentless shampoo. After that, he let Rumiko do his hair and choose his deodorant, which was kind of embarrassing too, and he even considered makeup to make his skin look better, but Rumiko talked that idea out of his head fast enough. And when he walked out of the front door and saw Mimi, he began to sweat again. And now Mimi says he smells nice…YAY!!

'Thank you…'

'…W-why are you so surprised?'

'I, uh…showered three times today…'

Mimi looks surprised.

'But you never smell weird…'

'Oh, I didn't know…'

The cinema doors open to let everyone in. Matsuda and Mimi take a loveseat, and wrap their arms around each other. They talk a bit about school and Rumiko's big bike crash last Friday, when the movie begins. A thriller. About a detective who has to find a serial killer who cuts away the hair all over his victim's body, and it's all clearly showed. Matsuda feels Mimi turn to him and bury her face in his neck every time a knife appears, and he holds her close. He really likes the movie, he notices. And he likes Mimi. Oh, how perfect. But no matter how much he likes the movie, he likes Mimi more, and it doesn't take too long before he and Mimi close the distance between their faces again and kiss until the lights turn on.

'Wow, that was a movie, wasn't it?'

'Y-yes, really, I never paid this much attention to the screen!!'

Matsuda smiles again. His first official date with Mimi is a big success. His clumsiness is forgiven, Mimi is the best girl in the entire world and they kissed again…

A strange sound comes from both their stomachs.

And twenty minutes later, Mimi and Matsuda sit in the park near Mimi's house, sharing an old good Italian pizza and a pack of Peach Ice Tea, watching the sun set and color the water with a nice orange glow.

**

'Ohh, that's so sweet…Matsu, you are probably so much sweeter than my boyfriend…'

'Really? Thank you!! You don't sound like you like your boyfriend too much right now.'

'No…Should I break up with him?'

'Why not?'

'Because I love him, I think.'

'Then, you could try it, right?'

**

Matsuda dreams. About the boy with the black hair and the black eyes, and the black lines under them. Brilliant L. Matsuda walks next to him, in a nice street with restaurants, the sun is setting and no one looks at the two young men/boys walking to an empty-looking restaurant. Huh? Why empty? It looks closed, and everybody walks around it with a big curve…Strange…Matsuda follows L to see a dark room with only dark-red lights glowing. What are they doing here…Is this a THAT kind of dream…

'Allright, Matsuda-san, if you could get me a scalpel…'

'What?'

'Please get me a scalpel.'

Matsuda suddenly notices the black box at his feet. He hastily opens it to get a scalpel out of it.

'Here…'

'Thank you, Matsuda-san.'

The long and slender fingers touch Matsuda's when he gives the stainless instrument to his co-worker. What does he want to do with it…?

'Please hold the head, we turn it around together.'

'What?'

A body lies next to the black box. A dead body, a corpse, lying with its face to the ground. And it's naked. After Matsuda helped him turning it around and show a face Matsuda believes he knows from work, L touches the hair on its chest, and points at it with his scalpel.

'We have to investigate this. For that, we'll have to remove this patch of hair.'

And the iron instrument sinks into the hairy skin to make a purple incision, and make it bigger, until the skin is fully removed from its owner. L looks at Matsuda with those endlessly deep eyes.

'Please remove the skin and take it over from me. There are more scalpels in the box. And more bodies to be done.'

Matsuda looks around. And hell, it's true. Dead bodies, everywhere. People staring up at the non-existing ceiling, people lying like they're asleep, people lying in embarrassing positions. But…All hairy people. Does he have to cut the hair away…?

He walks over to the first body he sees and turns it around. Hey, the Chief. The Chief has a moustache. Matsuda shudders when he inserts his scalpel in his own Chief's upper lip, and through the skin around the thick moustache, until he can actually grab the little hairy monster to remove it.

'L, what do I have to do with this?'

'Call me Ryuzaki. Eat it.'

'What?'

'Eat it. It's necessary for the investigation.'

Matsuda gulps and stares from his now moustache-less Chief (however, he has a wound in the shape of a moustache) to the…thing in his hand. He closes his eyes and puts it into his mouth.' Uhg, disgusting…He feels it tickle his inner walls when it creeps through his throat.

'Are you sure, Ryuzaki…?'

'Yes, I am sure, Matsuda-san. Please just follow my instructions instead of thinking of ways to escape from it.'

Matsuda gulps again at the sudden dark look in L's eyes, and turns around to another corpse. And he's kind of surprised to see Light Yagami lying in his dream. Naked, gorgeous, not hairy like the others, looking like he's asleep. Matsuda moves over to him to wonder what hair he should remove. He doesn't have too much choice. Light doesn't have leg hair, chest hair , apparently also no armpit- or facial hair, and Matsuda refuses to cut away the patch of hair in his lower regions. Are only left…His eyebrows, eyelashes and the perfect hair falling over his skull. Oh no, he doesn't have to…?

Matsuda hastily searches around for other hair to remove, maybe toe hair or wrist hair…? No, nothing…He shakes when he points the scalpel in the perfect skin of the boy's scalp, feeling sick when the cold blade sinks into the soft flesh. The eyes shoot open to reveal pain and angst, and Matsuda pulls his scalpel away from the boy and feels pure horror when Light touches the now heavily-bleeding wound on his forehead, close to his hairline. He lets out a soundless gasp and looks at Matsuda for a second when the bleedings get heavier and heavier, until he makes a dying sound and falls down in Matsuda's lap, still leaking blood and still warm.

Matsuda looks up to see L standing next to him.

'Well, it's perfectly clear that he was the culprit.'

Suddenly, L's face turns into a devilish grin. Matsuda notices the scalpel in his hand, and the way the black-haired detective looks at him.

'Oh, I get it…it was actually you? How bad, you killed Light Yagami, that's a shame. I'll have to kill you now.'

Matsuda tries to hide behind his arms when L lifts up his arm with the bloody weapon, and lets the metal fall down right to Matsuda's skull.

**

Matsuda sweats. He has his blankets kicked away and is now lying next to his bed, and his hands are clawing the sheets under him. God, he had a nightmare. He suddenly remembers where that movie, more than ten years ago, was all about. The detective turned out to be the murderer. And the detective was a nice and innocent-looking boy with no conscience…

Would L have conscience…? Matsuda wants to find out. He patiently waits until the red letters in his dark room show 7:00 and stands up. He showers all the strangeness away from himself and washes his hair, all of it, and shaves his chin and upper lip, and brushes his teeth three times to scrape away the uncatchable taste of…THAT in his mouth. And God, he has killed Light Yagami in his dream. And what was he beautiful. And so fragile, bleeding dead after a little cut in his forehead. Matsuda finds himself adoring Light in his thoughts, and decides to leave to work and let it all behind him. Maybe he'd tell Emi today…

When he arrives at the headquarters, today another expensive-looking suite with screens all around them, Matsuda looks at L. He looks normal…Well, like he didn't sleep or dream anything last night, but he doesn't look different from last time they met. He still looks mysterious and cute. No way L would kill him, or make him kill Light Yagami. And he is L, after all. A different detective from the one in the movie.

Which is already more than ten years ago.

They begin to work, L talks with Aizawa every now and then and after a while, the Chief's phone rings.

'Hello? Oh, hello, Light…'

Matsuda focuses his ears. Light Yagami.

'Really? Oh, that's nice of you, I'll go and get it…Oh, will you be waiting for me…? Don't you have to study?'

Matsuda notices L focusing on Soichiro's conversation too, with a strange look in his eyes Matsuda can't place. He notices the dark and wide eyes slide over the picture of Raye Penbar and back to the chatting man. He's thinking something…Matsuda feels curious. Does L know about Light Yagami's existence…?

'Oh, alright, I'll be there in fifteen minutes. You don't have to wait all the time, go and get yourself a nice sandwich…Really? Oh, that's nice, would you like to buy one with egg salad and bacon, too? Thank you…'

'Chief!!'

'Yes, Matsuda?'

'I'm hungry too!!'

'Oh, hang on a moment, Light. Do you want a sandwich too, Matsuda?'

'Oh, yes, one with tomatoes and cucumber salad, please…?'

**

'Hello, Light, son.'

'Hello, Dad.'

Matsuda has to watch Soichiro Yagami greeting his son with a hug, again. He feels strange when he thinks about the naked bodies from his dream tonight, that horrible monster under his Chiefs nose in his mouth, and the perfectness of the skin he'd been cutting in on the boy's forehead. He feels the urge to touch it, feel if the skin of the Real-Life Light is still intact.

'Here, I have the sandwiches. For you, an egg salad with extra bacon, and the one with cucumber salad and tomato must be yours.'

Matsuda suddenly feels shocked when the perfect honey eyes are watching him, the kind smile presenting the white package in the perfect hand. Matsuda touches them when he takes the package from him. His heart misses a beat. So delicate…!!

'And, Dad, how is it going with Kira?'

'I'm not allowed to tell you anything, Light.'

'Not fair…'

'How is it going with your study?'

'I'm not allowed to tell you anything, Dad.'

Matsuda laughs out loud. Wow, he never met anyone this perfect. He's been with the Yagami's before, but that was two years ago. Light was…Fifteen…? A very polite boy. And beautiful since the first days of his life. Matsuda has seen pictures of Light as a baby or a toddler, and as a breath-taking ten-year-old kid. Light is perfect. Like L.

Light. L. Light L. LightL. Lightel.

Lightel? Strange. Hey, where is he going? Light gives his Dad a hug, flashes a perfect smile to Matsuda and turns around to walk away. So fast…Can't he stay any longer…?

'Your son is amazing, Chief…'

'Huh? Yeah…I have a great son...'

Almost like a dream.

**

_A/N: Yesyes, Matsuda, who do you choose now? The pretty brunette or the mysterious panda? Don't wait too long, maybe they won't be free anymore if you do…_

_I don't know when I'll be updating next…I'll be moving to France within less than two weeks and then I'll be separated from the sweet internet for a full month…Maybe I'll be updating the next two weeks, if not…Don't forget mey!!!^^ I should be back at the end of August. I can't wait to develop this story furtherer, haha…Oh, well. See ya!!^^_


	4. Matsuda Follows

_A/N: And we're back:) France was amazing, but I couldn't really forget about writing, so I searched and asked(yesyes, I speak almost fluent French^^) for 'papier liniée' everywhere, but there was nothing, only paper with boxes. Enough of this. Matsuda's story has to go on^^ Though I forget writing for a lot longer…Sorry…^^_

_**4. Matsuda Follows**_

Matsuda walks down the streets, on his way home. Today was amazing. Light is amazing. L is amazing. Matsuda doesn't know who he likes more.

Light is smart, polite, perfect-looking and social, and he has a pretty smile. L is smart too, dark, cute and mysterious. And very pretty.

Matsuda wonders if he likes them more than good for him. He can't stop thinking about them.

Sometimes, he thinks about Light. About him and his pretty smile, but all for Matsuda. About the way his eyes would shine when he'd be in love…With Matsuda. Matsuda sighs. Light…

Sometimes, he thinks about L. About him and his look that seems to see all through Matsuda's brain, holding secrets Matsuda can only guess at. About the way the secrets would be revealed when he'd be in love…With Matsuda. Matsuda sighs. L…

L and Light. Light and L. Matsuda wants to sing out loud, horrible love songs he woke up with this morning, happy to see L again and hoping to see Light again. Waiting to see one of them.

Today, Light had came along again. With sandwiches, and today he'd also brought Matsuda one. A crispy one with lettuce, tuna and paprika, one that Matsuda had never tasted before but absolutely loved. Light had stayed a little longer and taken off his vest, he was inside after all. Light is very slender. And the shirt he wore looked so soft. Matsuda wanted to touch him, but knew there was no way he could. There was the Chief, and Light himself wouldn't really appreciate it too, maybe…

But Matsuda enjoyed talking to Yagami Light. He is easy to chat with and very funny to Matsuda, especially when he seemed to be occupied with his own thoughts. Light's eyes show a lot of emotion, but it's never clear what kind of emotions they actually are. Matsuda thought he'd seen worry, anger, fear, pride, happiness and something that resembled…obsession? Matsuda doesn't know. He wonders if L would see through them, like he always seems to do.

When Light had left, Matsuda had gone to L again. He came in and noticed L watching the screens where Light was momentarily walking away. Strange. The idea that those two knew about each other's existence felt weird to Matsuda. Then, L looked up and watched Matsuda come in with those heart-breaking eyes, perfectly blank and a shadow on the side of his face that wasn't turned to the computer. Matsuda wanted to touch him too…He rubs his nose and sighs. He feels so amazing.

And like he has a fetish for soft and boyish. Somehow.

BONK, BONK

"Toutaaa!! It's me!! Ai-chan let me in!!"

Emi. Matsuda stands up and hurries to the door. Wait…How did he come home, and why was he lying on his bed…?

"Emi!! How are you? Come in!!"

Emi walks in, sits down and looks around.

"Touta, are you so lazy that you forget to clean up…?"

Matsuda looks around and blushes. Yes, his whole room is over-loaded with clothes, papers, books, mugs and other things Matsuda recognizes as something he had in his hands in the last three days. He mumbles something about work and tries to pick up some boxers and throw them in his closet. Emi snickers.

"Haha, what is it? Are you in love or so, that you only want to daydream and don't feel like cleaning up and all…"

Emi stops when she sees Matsuda's helpless gaze with the bright red cheeks.

"Wow…Are you in love?! I thought you were still sad over Mimi!!"

Emi can sound so cheerful…Matsuda smiles at her.

"Yes, I actually like how I can forget Mimi now…It's handy, don't you think?"

A gleeful smile.

"Of course, Touta!! I was already worrying over you, that you would be depressed or so. I'm so happy for you…What kind of girl is she?"

That is so funny about what he and Emi have together. They always tell everything about their love, but never WHO he or she WAS. Matsuda knew Emi's boyfriend was smart and handsome, but arrogant and distant. He also knew he loved to touch his own hair when he thought no one looked. A simple movement like wiping a lock out of his own eyes, or a so-called itch at the back of his head. Though he didn't know the guy in person, or even his name. Nor had he ever met him.

Funny.

And Emi will soon know there are two persons Matsuda likes, how they were and maybe even the fact that they're both guys. Matsuda doesn't know yet. But, he'll soon find out about that too.

*******

Mimi frowns cutely when she's cutting cucumbers, and when she sneezes because of some pepper she inhaled, Matsuda notices. She fully concentrates on something, and forgets everything around her, whether the object of her attention is Matsuda, or a cucumber. Matsuda watches her movements quietly. In the beginning, she felt sorry for the cucumber that she had to cut it into pieces, but now she's digging into it with a big knife, that seems too big for her hands, with passion.

It was a good idea to make cucumber sandwiches with her for a date.

Matsuda continues on his yoghurt sauce with basilica. The sun shines and it's warm outside, but not too hot. The perfect Wednesday to eat sandwiches in Mimi's garden, where she and the other neighbors have dug a little stream of water that passes all the gardens in their neighborhood. Mimi's parents had found it cute to put a picnic table under their big oak next to the stream, where the sun could shine on it through the oak leafs. Matsuda can sit there forever. With Mimi, some homework or a book, food and nice weather…It's always nice in Mimi's garden. And in the winter, the stream will freeze and it will just be broad enough to skate on it. There are wooden fences with openings for it, so the whole neighborhood will be able to skate over it. Mimi often tells stories about making hot chocolate for others and selling it, or just passing it to whoever comes across. And when spring was there, everyone will collect the mugs they'd gotten from others and give it back with a smile. Matsuda wishes it's winter already. Making hot chocolate with Mimi, and drinking it when it freezes…It will be so much fun. And it somehow fits in Matsuda's nature to pass hot chocolate to others while it freezes.

"Touta-chan, what are you doing?!"

Matsuda looks up from his daydreaming and notices something red on his hands.

"You cut yourself!!"

Matsuda notices Mimi smiling while she grabs his hand and holds it under the crane.

"You should watch out some more, Stupy."

Matsuda receives a peck on his cheek and suddenly really enjoys the warm sun on his face.

*******

"We'll place cameras in the houses of the families Yagami and Kitamura."

Everyone in the room is shocked and gawks at L when he lets them know what his plans are. Cameras. Illegal…Criminals!! Matsuda feels like grabbing those slender shoulders and shake them harshly to bring back L's common sense.

"We'll be labeled as criminals too!!"

Matsuda and everyone else falls silent when they see L's look.

"I thought you were prepared to give your lives in order to catch Kira?"

Matsuda thinks. True…Sigh. Nothing to do about it, actually. He already noticed L is pretty stubborn and opinionated. Once something roams in that nice head of his…L probably knows what he's doing. Matsuda watches him sit down and tell them what his plans are.

He doesn't really hear them. He realizes something.

L is going to watch Light.

All day and night,

In order to prove his right.

Matsuda is a poet. He knows.

Not that he is such a good one.

But he is…

But, L is going to watch Light. THE Light. THE L. Even while taking a shower, or going to the toilet…? And what if Light feels the need to…Matsuda feels all the blood rush to his cheeks.

It only gets worse when he feels L's eyes softly touch his face for a second.

He sighs and lets his eyes rest on the wooden floor. He just has to see how it's going to turn out…

*******

Matsuda dreams about L again. He walks away from him and sometimes playfully looks over his shoulder, as if he wants to follow him. Matsuda runs after the slender and hunched figure, but doesn't seem to come closer. L only walks, further and further.

Suddenly, he stops. Something…It looks like he's talking to someone. Matsuda finally succeeds in getting closer to L and wants to touch his shoulder, but stops again when he notices the 'someone' in front of L appears to be Light. So, they met. How would they react on each other…?

They only stare. They seem to stare in each other's eyes deeply, without moving their eyes too much, without moving at all, as if they are statues. Very pretty statues. Matsuda can't make out with what look they're observing the other, but feels the tension almost drip off it. They don't seem to see him at all…

And then, L lifts his hand to Light's face and touches it softly, moving a little closer to the brunet. Light blushes and looks surprised, but takes L's hand in his, to holds it against his cheek. Matsuda is startled by the movements. Light and L, together?! That seems impossible…But no, they are. They are clearly moving closer to the other and enjoying each other's presence…Matsuda sees Light's eyes close when L's head moves to his. A kiss. They're kissing.

God, they are kissing.

Matsuda feels like ripping them apart. It's not good. Who should he love now, now that they love each other…?

They disappear. The ground is literarily gone from under Matsuda's feet, and he falls.

He wakes up in his bed covered in sweat, with his heart pounding in his ears and the adrenaline rushing through his veins.

*******

_A/N: So sorry I left this story dead!! I just didn't know how to progress…Does anyone have suggestions for what scenes in part 2-3 of the manga or ep 1-11 should leave in? Again, sorry, I just…Wait. What?! I never had a writer's block before!!! Heh. Gomen. Nasai. Yesyes…_


	5. Matsuda Sees

_A/N: Sorry for updating late again!! I'm just so slow with this story…Forgive me^^ I'm not known for being a fast updater anyway, so…^^ Sorry for making you wait (I hope..?^^) Plz vote on my poll (Do it now!! Only a few seconds!!^^) Enjoy Matsuda's world…:D Beware of bad puns on Light's nameXD_

_**5. Matsuda sees**_

"No, it can't be her. She's not intelligent enough to be Kira."

"W-what?!"

"Exactly what I said. She's not intelligent enough to be Kira."

That remark has definitely startled Soichiro Yagami. His wife, not intelligent enough…? That's insulting!! But what's even worse, L focuses on intelligence, so his son…Or at least, that's what Matsuda sees and hears when he comes in with sandwiches and new files with heart attacks in it. "Maybe", L said, "there is a trace in at what times Kira kills different types of criminals, who committed different types and/or amounts of crimes. Maybe we can find something that shows us how Kira thinks."

Matsuda needed half an hour to figure out what he meant by that. But he figured it out, and now he's watching L sitting next to Soichiro Yagami, in front of many screens displaying the Yagami household from various angles. Matsuda blushes when he sees Sayu sitting on the toilet and reading a shojo magazi- NO!! He's not allowed to see this!! He blinks and turns around.

"Do we really need to watch this, Ryuzaki…?"

"You can look somewhere else if you don't want to see your daughter using the toilet. I am focusing on your wife right now."

It's silent for a few seconds.

"R-Ryuzaki, what do you think…?"

"Exactly what I said. She's not intelligent enough to be Kira. Look, she's watching Gossip News, and actually takes it serious, you can make that out from her phone conversations with her friends. And her diary doesn't show otherwise."

Matsuda literarily hears the Chief's mouth fall open.

"You WHAT?!"

"I read her diary. It was poorly hidden and didn't contain anything interesting, but it was necessary to check."

L sounds so shameless. Matsuda wishes he could read someone's diary and declare it like this…

He'd like to read L's diary, if he has one. What goes around in that head all day long…?

"D-did you read any more diaries, Ryuzaki…?"

L's voice still sounds the same. Nothing that resembles shame, regret or consciousness.

"Yes, I also read your son's diary, via the webcam the installers of the camera's had with them. That one was more interesting. Yagami Light shows a lot of consciousness and intelligence about the world he lives in, and his ideas are far above the average adolescent's. And, he's probably gay."

Matsuda chuckles. L is funny. He hears Soichiro's chair hit the floor.

"W-WHAT?! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT IDEA FROM?!"

L doesn't seem to move or be distracted in any way.

"Do you want to know? Okay. See, Yagami Light writes very little about girls, and if he does it sounds bored. As if he only wrote it to make others think he's straight. Logical, don't you think?"

L is so funnyyyy…

"Matsuda!! That's not funny!!"

But Matsuda can't stop laughing. No, he can't, his lungs are ragging breaths in and out, his midriff shocks and he laughs uncontrollable, trying to speak but failing doing so. Funny, that was so funny, L is so funny, everything is so funny…

Matsuda barely notices himself stepping on a file and fall, his head hitting the coffee table.

Black…Funny, black…Matsuda feels himself still laughing while he slowly drifts away into the darkness.

*******

Black…Dreamy black…Matsuda likes it. It feels warm and calm. And soft, somehow. It reminds him at Mimi. Staying with Mimi and sleeping in her bed, next to her. She was soft and her pajamas weren't any different, though Matsuda was too shy to touch her really. She'd kiss his cheek and creep into his arms, and fall asleep after a while, leaving Matsuda alone in the soft darkness that was her room.

And when it was morning, the room would be lit nicely, no matter the time of the year. He'd feel a hand pat his cheek, waking him up, and he'd look at Mimi searching for her glasses to see better. He'd feel happy…Very happy. Happy with Mimi and her glasses, and her room.

Then, Mimi's mother would come in to call them for breakfast, an amazing amount of bread with delicious cheese, meat and chocolate spread to eat, and tea and fresh orange juice to drink. Mimi's parents would smile at him and ask him if they actually slept that night, and Matsuda would get too red to answer, so Mimi would have to. Her parents would still smile sincerely all the time.

Everyone around Mimi always smiled. Matsuda liked it. Loved it…It felt home. Warm and calm. And soft, somehow.

Something's slapping his face. It's bony and soft, Matsuda feels, and warm, like the warmth of a hand that just held a tea cup. Nice.

"Matsuda-san, wake up…"

A voice calling him. A voice he knows, and likes…Should he open his eyes to greet the face of the person belonging to it? Yes, that's a good idea…

Matsuda slowly opens his eyes to stare into L's. His face is barely two feet away from his. Gosh, L has never been this close…He's so beautiful. His skin is free of disorders, and so soft and full…Should he just touch it…?

"Right, you woke up. Please get up, Matsuda-san, there's work to be done…I have to go back to the screens, too. Please make sure not to hurt yourself again. Watari will assist you furtherer, if you feel the need to."

The face is gone. Matsuda blinks. Wooow, it was amazing…So perfect. L's eyes are wide, but it fits him. His gaze is intense. And those bags look soft, actually…

Now Matsuda is curious to feel L's face. And his bags. He wonders what L would look like if he were sleeping. It would be cute.

"D-does anybody need sandwiches…? I think I'll have to go and get new ones…"

No answer. L and the Chief are both staring at the screens again, absorbed in the sight of Sachiko gossiping about some acquaintance of her. Matsuda picks the sandwiches up and decides to eat them himself.

***

"Sandwiches?"

Aizawa isn't any better at all. It's like the whole world hates sandwiches today…

Matsuda looks hurt when Aizawa glares at him and turns back to the screens where Kitamura's wife is taking care of the curtains. How can curtains be any more interesting than sandwiches…?

"Are you sure? They're delicious…"

Aizawa grunts. "What's on it?"

Egg salad, lettuce, salt and pepper. Should be loved by anyone, right…?

"Right, give it…"

Matsuda smiles. Sandwiches!! They're love.

Kitamura's wife has strange hair. Matsuda chuckles, and Aizawa's afro turns to show an angry face.

"Something the matter, Matsuda…?"

Matsuda points at the screens.

"Funny hair…"

Aizawa frowns.

"Anything against funny hair, Matsuda…?"

Matsuda decides it's time to leave.

"N-no, nothing…Have fun with spying on the wife of the Chief's boss…"

Matsuda sweat-drops and turns around to leave. Sigh…There's nothing wrong with weird hair or sandwiches…

***

"I've always wanted to do this!!"

Matsuda smiles at Mimi while she puts a scale with sandwiches down on the table they put outside. Selling sandwiches in spring. Lovely.

"I did this before, it's fun!! The best is the first look in someone's eyes when taking the first bite."

It's a sunny day, the wind blows softly through the fresh green mid-spring leaves of the trees. Matsuda and Mimi are in a park, with the goal to sell one hundred sandwiches today. They don't know yet what to do with the money, but it has to go somewhere people need it.

The goal today is just making people happy with sandwiches.

"Let the customers come!!"

The first ten minutes, no one really notices them. Until a man in a suit walks up to them and asks for a chicken sandwich.

A 'portable' sandwich.

Sure.

He walks away again, as if in a hurry. Sad. Matsuda and Mimi had wanted to see the look in his eyes…

The second is a small woman in a flower dress who makes the world around her look gray, holding the hands of two children.

"Here, sweethearts, you can choose one you like, okay?"

"Yes, mommy…"

The girl, a small blonde in a pink Barbie-dress, points at the salmon.

"I want the pink one."

Mimi smiles and passes her the sandwich.

The blond-haired boy on the other side of the woman mutters a soft 'peanut butter' without daring to look at the sandwich sellers. When they walk away, they hear the little girl complain about the salmon.

"It doesn't taste pink!! I don't want!!"

"Here sweetie, we'll give them to your father…"

600 yen already. Good enough.

Matsuda and Mimi enjoy the sun, each other and the soft breeze in the air, though it is a little disappointing that no one seems to be in the mood for sandwiches. An hour passes, two hours, but they don't get to see that magic look in the eyes of a customer. Matsuda feels Mimi getting a bit tired.

"Touta, should we go home…? I don't think many people want sandwiches today…"

"Just wait another ten minutes. I'm sure we'll get to see The Look."

Mimi didn't think so, that was clear, but she stayed nonetheless. After five minutes, a family with two children appears.

"But Dad, it's bad for a child not to eat for too long…It's not healthy!!"

"Yeah, Nii-chan is right, I want a big sandwich, or my belly will get hurt!!"

"We'll be home within a few hours, and then I'll be baking fish fingers…"

"Sachiko, the kids are right. They're hungry and a few hours is too long for them to wait. Let's buy them something. I wouldn't dislike a nice sandwich either…"

It's just then that the man with the moustache in the light blue undershirt notices Mimi and Matsuda.

"Hey, look over there. Sandwiches."

The coffee-color haired girl runs at them with wide and enthusiastic eyes.

"Sandwiches!! Sandwiches!! Look how yum they are!! Do you have them with ham on it?!"

Mimi smiles. "Sure. Do you want one?"

"Yes, yes!!"

The woman walks at them with a thoughtful expression on her face, skimming the sandwiches thoroughly.

"Are they expensive…?"

Matsuda smiles too. "200 yen only. Fresh-made sandwiches with whatever you like…"

The girl almost jumps out of her skin.

"Ham, ham!! I want ham!!"

The son, a very pretty boy with brown hair and a naturally tanned skin studies the cucumber sandwiches with his eyes.

"I'll have one of those. You too, Dad…?"

The woman looks slightly disturbed that the kid asks his Dad's opinion instead of hers.

"Sure. What do you think, Sachiko…?"

The woman tries to object for whatever reason, when her stomach makes a growling sound.

"Gyaaah!! Mum is on a diet again!! Fun, fun!!"

The woman blushes and looks pissed now. Matsuda hears Mimi make the snorting sound she always made when she tried not to laugh out loud.

"Would you like a ham sandwich too, Madam..? It doesn't contain much calories and is delicious with our Ketchup Light."

The boy looks shocked for a second and the other family members (including the woman) giggle nervously. The little girl almost chokes on laughter. The man takes a step forward, ignoring the looks of his wife.

"Two ham sandwiches and two with cucumber salad, please…"

Matsuda hands them the sandwiches. The woman first tries to object, but when her stomach makes a noise so hard that other passengers look her way, she decides to take it. This time, they all take their first bite right in front of Mimi and Matsuda. Delighted. Four lit-up faces with happy smiles.

The Look, four times.

Matsuda smiles at a surprised Mimi.

"This sandwich is delicious!! What's in the cucumber salad…?"

The girl pats her big brother on his arm.

"Hahaha, maybe it's Mayonnaise Light, Hahaha…"

Matsuda smiles at the children. "Actually, it is. Beautiful guess."

The boy looks a bit confused at his sandwich before blinking and taking another bite.

"Can I have the Ketchup Light?! I wanna try!!"

The boy looks disturbed when his hyper sister eats the ketchup and shouts a "Light is delicious!!" through the park. Matsuda and Mimi don't get it, but it still sounds funny. The boy looks even more disturbed when everyone around him begins to laugh over what probably matters to him. After a while he gives up, turning his gaze into 'dreamy' and taking another bite of his sandwich, to look at it again with a delighted face.

The man with the moustache laughs. "Thanks for the sandwiches. Come and work at the police, we need a better taste of sandwiches there."

Matsuda smiles politely. As if he hadn't considered it yet. "I will think of it!!"

The family members smile at them for a last time and turn around, walking away again on what was probably their way home. Matsuda smiles at a delighted Mimi.

"That was a nice family!! Seen it?! The Look?! Four times, even that woman!!"

Matsuda blushes when he sees Mimi's face.

No one in the world has a brighter smile than she has.

And really…

That family made his day.

***

Matsuda walks into L's room. One o'clock at night. It's dark outside, and so is the room L is in. The only light comes from the small lamp on the table and the television screens L is staring at. Matsuda walks at him. He doesn't know what he's doing there, but he just felt the need to stay at the headquarters that night. Sometimes, L needs to go to the toilet, and someone to keep an eye on the screens (he'd watch them again later anyway), or needs to go get some coffee.

His form is motionless and even more slouched than usual. Matsuda walks at him. He notices a big pile of cups with traces of coffee on them. Ten, or twelve, or something…Matsuda looks a little better. Black coffee, with probably nine or more sugars in them. How could that be healthy…

Matsuda wonders how L had to feel all the time. No sleep, only coffee and sugar…No wonder he has those eye bags. A wonder his skin is still so equal and his eyes not bloodshot…

Matsuda walks closer to L. L doesn't react. A little closer. Closer…

Matsuda looks at L's face. Almost-closed eyes. L looks too tired to even register the sight of all the Yagami-family members sleeping. Matsuda feels a little shot in his tummy when he sees Light's angelic face. He sleeps so deep, so calm…He truly looks like an angel now.

The snoring of Soichiro is dimmed and a soft breathing sounds through the speakers. Light's breathing. It's calming to listen at. Light sleeping turns everything around him peaceful.

L's eyes are fixed on Light with the last power he has, Matsuda notices. Light. It's still weird to him that L knows about Light, and probably thinks about him. It's just strange.

And then, slowly, L's eyes fall shut and his forehead falls against his lower arms. Matsuda looks at it for a minute. L's face is turned to Matsuda, and his expression is peaceful too. L is beautiful, and an angelic sleeper too.

He looks at the two sleeping young men in front of him, feeling in love. Such beautiful creatures, both of them…Then he realizes he's staring at other men sleeping and feels weird. Matsuda hadn't thought about that. Being in love with L and Light meant loving other men, which meant Matsuda could be labeled with a pink piece of paper with 'gay' on it. Strange, that isn't what he means, at all...He doesn't feel 'gay'…

He takes another look at L and Light and decides that any person could fall in love with them, male or female. Their gender doesn't matter. If they would've been girls, Matsuda would've loved them too.

He sighs. He feels a little tie in his stomach. Butterflies.

Love butterflies.

***

_A/N: I should've called this story 'Matsuda's Sandwich Love'XD _

_Don't forget to vote and review:D_


	6. Matsuda Reads An Author's Note

**AUTHOR'S NOTE (apologize…)**

Damn, I swore I wouldn't put in things like this...

Hi, everybody who reads Matsuda Wishes…I know it's been a while since I updated last, but I don't really know how to continue this story. My attention has been occupied by my other stories, school, social life and the other usual excuses in Author's Note-'chapters'^^ I am sorry.

I have been struggling with this story, I don't know how to continue, I lack inspiration. And I could just give up this story, but I like it and I don't want to, I like Matsuda too much. It's just, indeed, the lack of inspiration and the feeling that I am repeating both the original Death Note and my other semi-canon-story (Love You, Hate Me), and the fact that it's mentally hard to switch from past to present when writing (I think I'm gonna change that if I continue, sorry for that). So I am asking for your ideas: What would you like to see in this story? The basic plot is in my head, but I need little moments, little things to keep the story going. Without feedback, I'm not gonna continue this story, if I continue, it would be mostly for you, my readers. If I don't hear anything from you, I don't feel like continuing. Apologies.

I hope you understand and react. Anonymous reactions are welcome too. Thanks.

Love, MLM


End file.
